God Bless the Child That’s Got His Own

My brand new, bad-ass son-in-law is a Green Beret in the U.S. Army, and he never ceases to amaze me. I marvel at his unshakable self-trust and inner core which never wavers. He has an invincible and humble sense of self and a belief in his own competence and in the competence of his team. He knows he is extraordinarily trained and he carries himself with a quiet self-trust and confidence in his capabilities. It is really something to behold.

No, I do not want to become a Green Beret. But I do want more of my son-in-law’s quiet appreciation of his own competence and unshakable belief in his great capacities.

Short of a self-imposed mental and physical boot camp, I wonder about how we can all expand these traits within ourselves and in those around us. Wouldn’t it be something if we could ‘boss’ our nervousness rather than our nervousness running the show, or embracing and managing our fear to take on a daunting challenge? I am certain that when a teacher deeply believes in their own competence, it becomes irrelevant if an administrator observes them or not. They provide their own self-talk like, “Aren’t I something? I cut off a problem before it became one,” or “I moved mountains today, yay me.” And more so, “I deeply know that I expanded capacity in this person,” or “I knowingly eased someone’s pain,” or “I deeply listened to hear someone correctly.”

There is no limit to how many times we can be in dialogue with ourselves with a spirit of quiet appreciation. Imagine your own two-way internal conversation where you can simply say, “Hurray. I did it!”

~Fran

Reflect on these 5 questions on belief in your confidence:

1. What are some favorite skills about yourself which you carry with you wherever you go?
2. What was a very hard task that you weren’t sure you could manage and you succeeded in the process?
3. What do you do and how do you respond when you receive a sincere compliment about your competence?
4. What do you want to ‘get smarter’ about within your own repertoire of skills?
5. What do you savor about yourself?

Let these quotes be an inspiration to you:

1. “Trust is a function of two things: character and competence. Character includes your integrity, your motive, and your intent with people. Competence includes your capabilities, your skills, and your track record. Both are vital.” – Stephen Covey
   
2. “Competence means keeping your head in a crisis, sticking with a task even when it seems hopeless, and improvising good solutions to tough problems when every second counts. It encompasses ingenuity, determination, and being prepared for anything.” – Chris Hadfield
   
3. “Love what you do. Get good at it. Competence is a rare commodity in this day and age. And let the chips fall where they may.” – Jon Stewart
   
4. “…true self-esteem comes from competence, not the other way around.” – Susan Cain
   
5. “The five Cs of expanding your capacity” – Sheila Heen
   • Build your confidence
   • Expand your connections
   • Improve your competence
   • Strengthen your character. If character is not strengthening your capacity is weakening. We need to check our leadership for leaks.
   • Increase your commitment”

April 2023

April 3, 2023
Meeting with S.C.O.P.E. – planning
April 4, 2023
AAIE Governance meeting
April 5-7, 2023
Passover Seders
April 10, 2023
Board training planning; Bullitt County Public Schools, Kentucky
April 13-14, 2023
Leadership site visits; Arlington, Public Schools, Virginia
April 17, 2023
Leadership site visits; Arlington, Public Schools, Virginia
April 18- 19, 2023
Principals Training; Arlington Public Schools, Virginia
April 20-21, 2023
Leadership site visits; Arlington, Public Schools, Virginia
April 25-26, 2023
Leadership Coaching; North Little Rock Schools, Arkansas